Have you ever been so lost and broken that you turned to drinking? Have you had a divorce? Had an abortion? Well, that was my story five years ago. 

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I clung so hard to a broken marriage. I was trying to fix a marriage and heal from his endless cheating, but without God at the center. I was a “Christian” at the time – I went to church but never actively practiced. I can say that I did not always speak from grace, and I was blinded by rage from my husband’s unfaithfulness. At the end of the day, he chose divorce. At the time, I was the mom of a 2-year-old, pregnant with my second child, and my ex-husband was active-duty army, all with talk of a year-long deployment on top.  I didn’t have much family and barely any friends at the time. I did not make room for them as a wife and mom, and I let those two words define me. I didn’t know who I was without those two words. Wife and mom.

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I remember being at war within myself as to whether I should keep my second child. I was alone and scared and unsure how I was going to raise two children alone. In the end, I chose to have an abortion. 

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I believe God was there in these moments, but I had hardened my heart and chose not to listen to him to keep the child. 

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My mental health following was not in a good space. My son went to live with his grandma for a month while I checked myself into Providence’s mental health center. 

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I came back but not fully healed. That’s when I started to pick up a bottle. On the weekends I would get babysitters and would drink excessively till I was black-out drunk. Until one day, after a wedding I had no place being at, I totaled my car and was arrested for a DUI. 

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My waters felt bleak and dark. I didn’t think I’d be able to swim to the other side. But God pulled me across and led me to be standing in front of you all today. This is where I believe God truly saved me. Because of that incident, I was led to the therapeutic courts – an 18-month intensive program that required groups and therapy. I then found ACF, a life group, and got connected to serving. As I walked the healing journey, I got rebaptized in November of 2025. Through all this, I believe God brought me here for a reason – to share my story with all of you. I believe wholeheartedly that if my story even touches just one person, I’m doing what I’ve been called to do. God has given me a mission and purpose in my heart like never before to let him use my story to bless others and bring him glory.  

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At the time, I didn’t realize that what God was rebuilding was his creation – building me into the woman I am today to better serve others. I have learned I am nothing without his grace, and trust me, I need it every day. I still fight the feeling to return to old habits, like feeling as though going to the bar would be fun or that it’s fine to just have that one drink. But I know if I keep showing up in the spaces God is calling me to be in, that everything else falls right into place. 

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In Christ, I learned that my past is not my identity. My hardship, my depression – any labels or words, like mom, wife, ex-wife – they are now a part of me, but they are not all that I am. When I had nowhere else to run or turn to but the One King forever, he gave me a call to action to help others and advocate for those who may be struggling. I no longer identify with the other labels being put on me, but rather declare my identity to be one thing alone: daughter of Christ.