Everybody likes a winner. Take today's verse for example. There are two teams at play in the world. Read it and you know that God is Captain of the winning team. This is supported by similar verses:

‍

It is written:

“As surely as I live,” says the Lord,

“every knee will bow before me;

  every tongue will acknowledge God.” (Romans 14:11)

‍

The Lord says to my lord:

“Sit at my right hand

   until I make your enemies

   a footstool for your feet.” (Psalm 110:1)

‍

It's clear that God wins.

‍

That being so clear, I thought this would be one of the easiest devos to write. I mean, who doesn't want to be on the winning team, right? Well, God quickly revealed to me that there are many who have doubts they are on the winning team, including me at one point. What I thought was going to be an easy devo to write, quickly became the hardest. And the reason for that is because of the person to whom I write this devo.

‍

I write this devo for my Christian brothers or sisters who are suffering debilitating pain or hardship. The spiritual trauma you're experiencing leaves you with feelings of abandonment, isolation, doubt, anger, or more. You are wondering how a loving God can allow your situation to occur or continue. Your pain is so great that verses like today's from Romans are not comforting. You're struggling to find hope.

‍

First off, know that I love you. You are my brother or sister through Christ. It pains me to know that you're suffering such immense grief. With your permission, I wish to come along side and try to help ease the pain you are feeling. If I have your permission, please read on.

‍

I don't know exactly what you are going through, but I have a rough idea. I, too, have experienced feelings like you are experiencing. Please know I am not comparing anything I've experienced with your situation. This is not a competition nor a pep talk. I simply want you to know that I understand how you feel. I've been there. What helped me tremendously in situations like yours is to know that I wasn't alone. And assuming you are similar, I want you to know that, too. You are not alone.

‍

God knows exactly what you are going through, and it's to Him that I lift up your name and situation and pray for His peace, mercy, and love to comfort you. You may not be able to receive that prayer right now. I know I wasn't. But here's how God helped me push through a dark spiritual season in my life. I hope it helps you.

‍

What happens when you die?

‍

That question was put to me at a time when I had serious doubts about a loving God. To cut to the chase, there are only two possible answers to that question:

‍

Answer One: Nothing. You just die and your body rots to nothing.

Answer Two: You begin an eternal relationship with a loving God in a perfect world where evil, sin, and death have been defeated.

‍

So, when I could, I compared the two, and I ask that when you are ready, you compare them, as well.

‍

If you choose to believe Answer One, it simply adds hopelessness and despair to the already tough list of emotions you are experiencing. Answer One is a slippery slope into a pit of the muck of despair and the mire of depression. Answer One simply makes a difficult situation worse, much worse.  

‍

If you choose Answer Two, you are giving God the benefit of the doubt and putting your trust in Him. Hard to do right now, yes, but if you don't trust Him, then where do you put your trust? Is there a better place? As hard as it was for me to believe at the time, God promises to always love me, never forsake me, never leave me, always pursue me, and to give me purpose. God's mercy is so great that He became man, gave His life, and defeated death, for me. These pillars of Christian truths are totally unique in the history of the world. Only the one true God has sacrificed as such. Isn't that worth the benefit of the doubt?

‍

I confess I was reluctant, but over time I realized that the possibility of hope is better than no hope at all. So, I simply made a logical decision: I chose to trust Answer Two, the possibility of hope. As time went on, I found myself trusting God more and more. Eventually, I was able to look at things more openly. When I did, I realized He had never changed. He wasn't forsaking me; I was forsaking Him, and all the while, He was patient with me. I didn't realize it at the time, but through it all, God was loving me. He placed people and opportunities in my life to help me grow.

‍

I'm not the same spiritually. While the pain and trials are real and continue to this day, learning to trust God has honed me spiritually. To the point that, today, it's far easier for me to put my trust in God. I have hope again. I feel joy again. I love God again. I feel like I'm on the winning team, captained by a loving God. Not every day is a walk through roses, but with God, I'm better able to handle the days that aren't.

‍

I chose to believe Answer Two, and I'm better today for it. God is faithful. I hope and pray that, when you are ready, you will choose Answer Two, as well.

‍

Thank you for giving me permission to come alongside. I sincerely hope that in time, you also will feel like you are on the winning team, because you are. That is such good news and yields so much hope that joy will follow. It doesn't eliminate the pain or the trials, but your ability to trust God through them improves immensely. I will continue to pray for you, my brother or sister. As much as I love you, God loves you infinitely more. I firmly believe that. On that truth, you can place your trust.

‍

With love, your brother in Christ, Allan

My God, where are you? Forgive me, but I can't see your face. Please help me through ________ (pain or trial). Please don't let me forsake you, adding hopelessness and despair to my list of ailments. In your mercy, please don't give up on me. Please leave the 99 and come after me. I don't want to be alone. I need you. You are my God – a God who loves me. Help me, please. Amen.