My whole life, I’ve been a talker. In school, there were some kids you could move around, maybe away from their friends, and they’d stop talking in class. That was not the case for me. In fact, my seventh-grade history teacher tried to solve this by putting my desk right next to his. Guess what? He got tired of me talking to him! There were at least a few times I just barely missed the A Honor Roll because of my conduct grade—docked a whole letter grade for chattiness.

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The thing is, if I’m so busy talking nonstop, I’m probably not taking time to think about what I’m saying or to listen well. I’m also more likely to run my mouth when feelings are high, to overshare, and to create a web of problems with my lack of self-control. Earlier in the week, we read Proverbs 18:21, which warns us that the power of life and death is in our tongue. There are also similar warnings throughout the book of James, a New Testament book of wisdom like Proverbs. In James 1:26, we’re told that our religion is worthless if we can’t tame our tongues. Most of James 3 warns about the destructive power of the tongue and how difficult it is to rein in. If the books of wisdom in the Bible have so much to say about speech, it’s safe to say it’s important for us to pay attention.

In today’s verse, we’re reminded that our tongues can be used to harm or to build up. I think we tend to view some speech as neutral. But even speech we consider harmless can have impact. I’m sure there are some words you could think of right now that stung when they were spoken to you, and you’ve carried them ever since. You can probably also think of some harsh words you’ve spoken to someone else. It’s not just the mean words we have to watch out for either. It’s also gossip, slander, crude jokes, and more.

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Taming our tongue is hard, and it takes ongoing effort. Thankfully, Jesus gave us Holy Spirit to help. We can pray for God to help us become wise, control our speech, and use it to build others up. Proverbs tells us that this is a mark of wise living.

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Where does your speech need help today? Is it in a specific relationship or situations when your feelings are high? If there’s a specific person you’re tempted to speak “words of death” to or about, try blessing them instead. You’d be surprised how much that starts to shift your heart. Is it a certain environment, like work, where maybe it’s been hard to hold onto holy speech? Invite Jesus to help you take an inventory of your words today and then repent where you need to. Ask Him to change your heart and to help you control your tongue.